FINALLY!!!

Went to NATAS today...Boy were there alot of people lor considering today is only the 1ST day lor. Aniwei, have decided where to go liao oh...hahaah....so excited...off i go to USA!!!! But still need to confirm my air ticket again next month...Daddy says he will put in the ballot for me early next month....MY GRAD TRIP, here i come!!!

Ah...kinda settled the travel part liao. And of course my long awaited letter finally came. Phew!! Wait until my neck also long liao... been waiting for this letter for the past 3 wks can?! I was at the fair when my brother called to tell me that my letter came... so i asked him how? Thick or Thin? After thinking, he said 'not too thick, not too thin'...okay! It got me abit worried though and yet there seemed to some hope...I didn't wanna think about it, but I just cldn't get it out of my mind leh...

Came home, 1st thing i did was search at the table where letters are alwayz put, don't have leh...*must be in my room*...Went in like usual and headed for my table and there it was...Tore open the letter and ah there is was. I'VE BEEN ACCEPTED....I'M GOING TO BE A TEACHER!!!!*excited*

(Ms Chen)...sounds a bit weird...But aniwei, will need to go for a briefing next month, and more details will be given then about the medical checkup and whether or not will be entering NIE this coming July... Shall just wait and see lah...Wonder what i will be asked to teach?Science? (i hope not...)Maths? (not too bad)English? (u sure?!...)hahhaah. Meanwhile, better get on to do more substantial work man...EXAMZ are round the corner...

Ah...just kinda finished part of one paper today and another one to go...Must jia you!!! K lah...Shall write till here today...oops feeling a little hungry though...shld i eat?hmm...

New Hair Cut!!

Okie...Just got home from my cousin's wedding...grinz. It was not bad...nice video they had though...how advance technology can be man!!!

Ah..Just thought I'll be zhi lian for once and put a picture of myself...hee hee... Just got my hair cut today...Quite short compared to usual...today my mum didn't complain that i cut too little...hahahh..owell...
Shall be back here to blog again...Going blading with julie they all tmr...Woah...haven't blade for a very very LONG time liao...nitez

Haiz...I'm back here again!!!

When i woke up this morning, the first thing that came into my mind was a hymn i used to sing during chapel in school. I sat up and wondered why for a while, thinking was God answering my prayer to him last night?! So I decided that i was going to look up the verse related to this hymn once i got home from school.

School was okay today. Had some discussion & tutorial for china history today. Woah... After 9 wks in school, finally i said something perfect. We were discussing about 'The True Story of Ah Q' and its relation to China.

Prof was asking about the name Ah Q: what does this imply?
Someone said maybe it had something to do with the Qing dynasty?
And i said, it represents the hairstyle during that time (i.e. the pigtail) coz that pigtail was also called the 'queue'. wahaha... and it has been used as a representation of china.
Then Prof said 'excellent answer!'

It sure felt good after so long, been feeling upset and unsettled. I felt myself getting me back abit already. Which is definitely a good start. And after that i went home feeling slightly happier. Things got worst during lunch time...I cldn't really eat, but i had to force myself to. Alot of things came into my mind. Am I all that bad? Am I too shallow? Or simply, I don't think the way my age should be thinking? That HE didn't like me...haiz. Guess I was thinking too much.

Stop with the grumbling. Back to the hymn that came into my mind, this is the actual verse from the bible:

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters,
he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff will comfort me.

Psalm 23:1-4

I didn't quite get it initially, then a thought dawned on me. I prayed to God asking for help last night and I asked that he forgive me for forsaking him for so long and to re-accept me as his child again. This was his answer to me. It was just amazing. I always believed that God was there, but today I saw how real he could be.

This time, I sure was badly hurt, but I noe God will be there to guide me and help me through these difficult times. Time heals all pain!!!

Aniwei, enough of yakking...got to get back to doing my assignment. Have a MA presentation next wk...Haiz...Jia You bah

Phew!I finally said it!!!

Thank God for the courage you gave me.
Now I truly understand what you had told me.
I was afraid of the hint you gave
But now I am glad you came into me and helped me.

I never thought I could be that bold, but God, you answered my prayer and gave me what i needed: COURAGE
At first I was scared of what;s going to come out of this, but now I'm so relieved and glad.

I told HIM and I got an answer. I wanted so much to cry, but I stopped myself. I have to be strong, and push on...And most of all, I'm glad we're still friends, really! I thought I was going to lose a friend coz of this. It turned out okay i guess. Yup yup...

Suddenly, I felt all alone...my good frends are all away overseas.

Girl, thanks for calling! It was really nice hearing your voice again. I feel so much better after talking to you... U take care too ya. If you need me, I'll alwayz be there!!!

Sadness will only tire you out...but i assure you it wunt be long for Rabbito. A quote from the movie i watched yesterday: Laughter is a God sent to this troubled world!

And I want that smile to be back on me again. Examz are drawing really near, need to find myself back quick and be back on my feet again. And take this time to understand God better too.
Owell...shall write till here. Going to sleep liao.So tired and got to get up early to go sch for discussion & tutorial. Jia You!!!!

If you are reading this entry, thanks for telling me how you felt!!!Coz it's a burden off my heart. Yes I may be upset, but I sure will be back stronger than before!! Haha...Pray for me k. Hope there wunt be any awkwardness k.

Just a random post

At gecko on this monday afternoon is certainly unusual for Rabbito. oh Gecko is a cafe-like eating place just next to the bookshop in school... Had lunch here coz got 4 hrs to spare before meeting up the other gals for project meeting. Y here i wonder... Library is too cold and quiet to study, canteen: sick of the food there, and cannot GO HOME!!!

Usually monday only got 1 lecture from 10-12 and off i go home to rabbito's nest. But today have to wait. Dislike staying in school apart from having to attend classes though...Tat's my working style.

Sitting out here with my china history text that i so want to comprehend, I feel so lost and helpless. Pages full of words, I so do not want to read it, but i have no choice...EXAMS at stake...Haiz. I MISS YOU so much...Things haven't been that smooth since you left. Looking forward to the end of the semester, for a break and for you to return...Owell...

I feel so lonely...this studying is making me very frustrated. I want to do well, but the drive is not there AT ALL!!! I think i lost my ability to remember...and tat's really bad. Wat's history without remembering ur FACTS!!!

ah...can anyone tell me wat to do? I'm trying a new approach...I seriously hope this works, if not I so don't know how i'm going to cope in my exams... Is the last semester already, and things had to turn out this way. I hate it and I want t0 stop it, but i dunno... I guess i think too much at times.

I am so depressed...I need a break from all this...And i need my momentum back...I need the strength to keep running, but it seemed to have all disappeared. I feel lousy... I'm an ESCAPIST, yet i'm trapped here!!!

Haiz...Rabbito's recent life has been filled with dark clouds and it wunt disperse away... You said u hope to see the smile on my face back, but just don't have the reason to smile...I want to, but it's just so difficult...

Should really get back to my books now...a slight distraction & i needed to say it out.

Is Everything Alright?!

Juz done with my reflective essay...
Attacked by the FLU bug for the past 2 days
It just wouldnt go away

Things seem so weird
The feeling is not right...Y react like tat?
The smile has gone into hidding...Y wunt it appear?
Moody, unfocus....
Doing things just as required...no heart was truly put into it.
Are u feeling this way too?
No motivation & want to get out of here!!
I wish to know...

Haiz...About 1 and half months to exams
I dunno how much i understood or remember!
School time passes so quickly
I'm apprenhensive about life after Uni...


Quote: Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.

Tell me wat i can do?
Is everything alright?
It juz wunt go away!!!

weekend again!

Past 1 week hasnt been exactly goin on that well...haiz...had 2 tests (MA & china)....I ve no idea wat's on with me lor...i studied for my china test leh, but juz cant seemed to remember much during the test!!! ah...this is so not supposed to be happening in my last sem at uni man! DIE....definitely will FAIL!!!

Owell...25% weightage can...and getting it back next wk...I so don;t wanna look at it lor. MA was okay but there wasnt enough time to finish the paper...crap! 50 MCQs in 1 hr and more than half the paper was calculations!!! Think will be okay though...hee hee

Aniwei, something even worse...i totally screwed up my environment tutorial. I cant believe it, an econs student cannot even do simple mathematics....differentiate also can differentiate WRONGLY....mind not focus at all lor.

Yup yup. went for an interview on thurs... shh...not goin to say wat interview is it yet...will be back here to tell more SOON!!! I hope i get through.For those of u whu are close to me might be able to guess wat it is...grinz...wish me luck!!!

Okay lah...shall blog till here today..will be back here with more updates...gtg do some readings liao....